Mental

You all probably believe I have commitment issues. I can assure you I do not! I am a devoted person. I am devoted to being on time{just ask my friends}, keeping my appointments, sticking with my beliefs, going to work, getting cleaning done, devoted to my friends and family and especially my husband.

You get the picture.

I have anxiety issues. I get very anxious over the things I share here. I get anxious about what I will post in the future. And ultimately, feel anxious over not being able to share good enough content that I envision. I don’t feel good enough. I touched on this in the past. I thought it was a creative rut, but, now that I sit and actually mull over how I feel, its anxiety. I am scared. Its hard putting yourself out there. For me especially. I am a very quiet person, I am a tad shy and I over analyze every move I make. Its a bit debilitating. But, I actually want to put myself out there. I love blogging. If only I could jump over that brick wall in front of me.

So, how do I try to fix the issue? Oh, I’ll just buy a new camera and computer!

Thing is I don’t have the money to do that. My husband said I need to be content with what I have to work with right now and produce the best content I can possible for the blog and just build on it when I have the means.

How accurate was that advice? So, accurate!

I know what I need to do now. I need to take advantage of what I DO have at this very moment and just do the best that I can. Even if it makes me a bit anxious and doesn’t look in my eyes “perfect”. I just need to make better time to take better pictures with my iphone{oh god} and just do the best that I can do for the time being.

So, no more excuses why I don’t post that much or at all. This blog was suppose to be fun not a burden. I now have an actual schedule I will be sticking to and that is all there is to it.

 

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ninammariee

Nina. 28. Central Pennsylvania. I enjoy talking about music, books, makeup, hair, clothing, lifestyle, and eating healthy{work in progress}. What I enjoy here will be published on my blog.

6 thoughts on “Mental”

  1. I’m sure you were lol, as I do my own husband. He’s finally realized after 17 years together that I don’t choose anxiety, it haunts me. I use to thrift store shop like it was the apocalypse. We had more crap than a litter box. Once I realized it was anxiety I nipped it but I still crave that feeling…if I get this I’ll be great! If I have that I’ll have order.

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    1. My main problem is I will over analyze a situation until I feel almost batty. It’s really weird. And since I started birth control it’s gotten worse, but I can overcome it…some days better than others. I feel your pain!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeah, I’m not in trouble there. We have too many kids so for Christmas my hubby got snipped! Yessss! Birth control pills can be dosed differently so bring it up with the doc. I over analyze until my fears become part of that ‘ once, twice, three times I’m crazy’ kinda feeling. It does get better. Keep a journal and write down triggers. Only write for two weeks, and at the end of it you go back and read. I was so surprised what my triggers were.

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  2. Yeah, well, I have only been married for 9 months and I am not ready to be a mom yet! My friends said to bring that up to my doctor as well, when I go for my yearly check up I will bring it up. But, thank you for the advice, I will try that!

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